So it actually happened. There’s no hiding behind the truth anymore. I’m definitely, without a doubt, middle-aged.

Halfway through the walk of our life
I found myself wandering through a dark forest,
for I had lost sight of the path forthright
– Dante Alighieri, Inferno I (translated by me)

It is commonly believed that Dante Alighieri was thirty-five when he walked right into the entrance of his personal Inferno. One that was mainly made up of awful people he despised, but great writing on his part. I can say I’ve definitely experienced the first, but struggle a lot with finding the latter.

There have been times in the past 12 months that felt like walking through a dark forest. Luckily, there were also moments of sunlight through the darkness, which made each one of them all the more significant and cherished.

I find it difficult to come to terms with the idea that we have already “peaked” in our lives, and that from now on every aspect of life will be, on average, both more difficult and more tedious to deal with.

On the bright side, this year I’ve managed to dive deeper into two hobbies that I always wish I had more time (and talent) to explore: birdwatching and tabletop board games. The irony of these two hobbies growing on me only after I turned 30 is not lost on me: these are “old people” hobbies, I know. But what can I do? I enjoy them and I’m not getting any younger anyway. Might as well embrace the grey hair and ever-growing disgruntled attitude towards any change I don’t agree with.

All things considered, I don’t know how I should feel about the next 12 months. I’m sure there will be difficult trials ahead for our family. At the same time, I am a bit more confident today than I was a year ago about our ability to weather the storm, come what may.

It looks like next year will be a uphill battle on many fronts. At least I know I’d rather walk up a hill than down. It’s easier on the knees.

After I gave some rest to my body at last
I was already on my way forward
So that the lowest of my two feet was always steadfast

– Dante Alighieri, Inferno I (translated by me)

Last, but not least, I wish we’ll be able to travel a bit more. It might be just the antidote to a lot of other things that might go wrong between now and next year.

Maybe it might even encourage me to write more. Who knows.

If I do, you can bet you’ll find my ramblings here. As always.